(Lidt usædvanligt er dette indlæg på engelsk.)

George O'Brien, a good catholic from the outskirts of Dublin, went to Germany to visit his sister Claire, her husband Hans and their children.

Unfortunately, Claires oldest daughter, Katarina, was 16 and a beauty. And George O'Brien was stricken with her, and wanted her, even though he knew such thoughts were wrong.

He tried to think only pure thoughts, but her looks, her way of moving and her smell slowly drove him mad. Almost desperate he went to confession in the local parish, where a Priest declared himself able to hear a confession in English - although the Priest spoke with a thick German accent.

"Forgive me Father, for I have sinned," he told. "I'm having unpure thoughts of my sisters daughter, a wee lass of 16, and I do not know what to do".

So the Father told him - George O'Brien was shocked, surprised, happy and elated - all at the same time. But went to do as he was told, starting off by lighting 10 candles in the church.

That same night, a police patrol car was stopped in the road, by a half-naked, desperate teenage girl.

"Help! Help!" she cried. "My uncle tried to rape me!"

"Calm down, girl," the police told her. "What happened?"

"I woke up in the middle of the night," she told them. "A man was moving in under my covers."  She continued to explain how the man had tried to force himself upon her, to perform oral sex. And how she had resisted, and discovered the man was in fact her mothers brother, and how he had seemed surprised at her resistance - so she was able to get away. In a panic she had run from the house - and that was when she met the patrol car.

The police went with her to her house, where they found George O'Brien in a desperate prayer on the floor.

"What have you been doing, "they asked him. "This girl claims you tried to molest her?!"

"Aye, that is all true," George answered. "But I only tried to do what the Priest at the church told me."

"That sounds unlikely," the police said. "How is that? What did he tell you?"

"Well, I was somewhat surprised, I must say," George explained. "He told me to light 10 candles, and to go down on my niece, and pray."

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