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onsdag den 27. april 2011, kl. 23.15

Donald Trump: Hawaii er måske slet ikke USA

Jeg har fået et eksklusivt interview med rigmanden Donald Trump, efter at han i dag tilsyneladende led et nederlag, da Obama-administrationen udleverede det store fødselscertifikat for Obama. (De har tidligere udleveret det lille men det var ikke godt nok.)

Leoparddrengen: Mr Trump, first of all, let me congratulate you on last weeks acquisition of the Danish blockbuster-party, Newly Liberal Alliance!

Donald Trump: You're welcome!

LPD: Now, I imagine you may be dismayed at todays news from the White House?

DT: Not at all, not in the slightest!

LPD: How come?

DT: Well, it is really just a piece of paper, right? You could write anything on that?! Actually, it's not even a piece of paper, it's a file on a computer. You know how easy it is to fake such a thing? Have you checked the date on the file? It doesn't say 1961, it says 2011.

LPD: So you are saying the file is faked? Or the certificate is?

DT: I'm saying no such thing - I'm saying it could be! And I want to help the President clear this up, so we can focus on more important things, like tax cuts and removing the deadweight restrictions on the financial markets.

LPD: But... if the birth certificate is actually the genuine article - will you admit that Mr Obama is actually a born American?

DT: No! Most certainly not!!

LPD: Why is that?

DT: Well for one, his allegedly born in Hawaii - is Hawaii actually a part of US?

LPD: Well, it is one the fifty states...

DT: Is it? Or more to the point: was it - when Obama, allegedly(!), was born?

LPD: According to my information it became the 50th state on August 21, 1959? Two years before Obama was born?

DT: But did it? I mean, maybe there was some kind of law passed that day - but was it in effect in 1961? I'm not saying it wasn't - but these things have to be investigated.

LPD: But... for the sake of argument; if the birth certificate is true; if Hawaii was actually a US state - will you concede he is the legal President in that case?

DT: No, certainly not!

LPD: Whyever not?

DT: Because maybe his father was a terrorist!

LPD: Whatever gave you that idea?

DT: Well, why not. He was a Kenyan after all - you saw what they did to our embassy!

LPD: Have you any evidence whatsoever that Mr Obama's father was a terrorist?

DT: I'm not saying he was - I'm saying he might have been!

LPD: Even then - let's say Obama's father was a terrorist. That doesn't mean Obama can't be President...

DT: I'm not sure - it might...

LPD: How come?

DT: It might be written in an amendment. "No son of a terrorist shall ever set foot to become President of the U.S. of A" or something to that effect. I don't know. I'm just saying, it needs to be investigated. After all, if Obamas father is a terrorist, I think the American public has a right to know the truth!

LPD: Well, I think that more or less wraps things up. I can see where you stand. Just one thing... do per chance have dealings with Karl Rove? I think I recognize his style...

DT: Turdblossom? He's pissed... I'm using his material, but I'm not giving him credit. I'm the Ace in the Hole, the final Trump-card. And he can't do a thing about it. Rove: you're fired!!

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